I don't like being that way anymore because it reminds me a lot of the old me and I always have this constant fear of slipping back to some of my old ways. I know that cannot possibly happen because I do not internally feel the same way as I used to, but still it can be a familiar feeling at times.
Seems from the time I hit the floor today all the way up until now, someone is whispering "you should have just slept the day away; you dummy!"
When I rolled out of bed this am as usual I asked Diane what she wanted for breakfast and she requested some toast. I figured I'd throw together a cheese omelet and an English muffin for myself. Sat morning we had stopped by the local bread outlet and picked up a few packages so I left one out and froze one.
As I was getting ready to cut the first muffin I noticed mold on the muffin! We just got them! The whole package was ruined! Figuring there may have been some moisture in the package I tossed them and pulled the frozen package out and guess what, yup MOLD! WTF!
I guess that wasn't the only issue, when I went to butter Diane's toast I dropped butter all over the counter. Then when I walked into work my coworker didn't sass me with his usual smart ass greeting. It felt as though the world had been tipped off its axis.
Saturday morning I went for another round of electrolysis and as usual it went fairly well and the pain is tolerable still. I'm so mad at myself for not getting this part done sooner. The owner Rita has a super personality and it really helps to pass the time.
I guess other than that you could say that things have been pretty uneventful this apst weekend, not a bad thing at all I guess. This coming weekend we are taking Monday off for our 18th wedding anniversary so it'll be nice to have a long weekend to kick back. We still haven't decided how or where we should spend this anniversary.
I read the other day where the NH DMV may allow for gender marker changes in the future without the surgery. The only drawback is that you'd still have to have your criteria completed for surgery to qualify so the only people it really helps are those who have done RLT and do not want surgery. The downside is with a female name on my license and a little "m" in the corner I fear that I could be subject to discrimination if asked for my ID
The only other piece of business for me personally is going fulltime. I mentioned to Diane the other night that I think I might shoot for Oct 1st. I'm trying to decide this week if I want to fire off a letter to HR declaring that date as they are waiting for word. We'll see if I can get myself to send it now
3 comments:
Oh gosh, you really did have a "should've stayed in bed" kind of day!! *hugs*
Bummer about the mould! That's not a good way to start a day.
Glad your electro is going well. I had a half hour today with no Emla. Not bad a-tall.
Hopefully, whenever anyone looks at your licence, all they're paying attention to are name, photo, and birth date. Who looks more closely? I've travelled to the States and back twice now with my Canadian passport that says "M," and no border guard has even blinked.
"Knowing" you only through this blog and the photos you post, it boggles my mind to think that you are still going to work as Kevin. Of course, long hair is normal for you, but still. I see no guy there. :) The only thing between you and full time is work, right? Hope it all goes very well!
Hey Veronique,
Glad to hear your electro is going well too. I've heard stories of how painful it was supposed to be and I've yet to experience that.
As far as work goes and even a few friends. Regardless of what I look like they state they see male features. The funny thing is that people who don't know simply see girl no matter what i wear. Sara had a good point about long term memory.
The one thing my therapist has mentioned in the avenue was that because I had a bit of androgyny about me for such a long time. (long hair, pierced ears etc that making the jump isn't as drastic for me so people wont notice is as much as someone who was pure macho male. So yeah, you're right in that sense.
I do however really appreciate the comments on my appearance. It's people like you that keep it balanced enough that I know people see Karyn ...
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