Jun 2, 2008

Back from vaca

Been a few weeks since I've posted anything, I'm doing well and just got off my vacation. I have a belief that anytime off work is good time and this was no different. I've found I really needed to time off. So, if you have emailed me and not gotten a response then that is why.

As of today we are two weeks away from the official court date for the name change. As I write this I have butterflies in my stomach. I can't believe that time has gone by so fast and that one of the biggest moments of my life is almost here. It is pretty overwhelming to say the least.

Last Thursday a member of the guitar board I run posted a rant on the court passage of gay marriage in California. Generally political threads are frowned upon simply because they always end up in a major fight between liberals, conservatives and everyone in between. While I do not agree with the initiator I do hold firm the belief that it's a free country and you are entitles to your own opinions. That is until that opinion is used to suppress an entire class of people.

During this thread one member showed his true colors by not only gay bashing but using epithets to make his point at one point even attacking. "Trans" people. A good friend of mine "Todd" came out swinging explaining how it wasn't a choice and he had a friend going through it. That he thinks no less of this person they were still simply, his friend. It was heartwarming and inspiring considering I knew I was the friend he had been referring too. The counter post was something to the effect of "I'm sure there are mentally ill people all over the board"

After pondering this members bias and my friends defense I decided it was a good time to tell my story and posted it for the entire membership to see. I have to admit it was pretty nerve-wracking to hit that post button and let the chips fall, I have so many friends on that board that I had a lot of worry. I'm happy to say that not only were my worries unfounded, all my friends embraced me in a positive manner. Again in preparing for the worst and hoping for the best I was pleasantly surprised and very amazed.

Walking with G.I.D most of your life and not understanding yourself is one thing, but to have to reveal your most fragile part of your being is emotionally draining driven by pure fear, after all who wants their heart crushed

It's amazing so much good can come out of the dust of such a negative thread …

~K~

2 comments:

Sara said...

Hi Karyn, and welcome back!

What a touching and encouraging story. It's sad how a person can have so much public dislike for LGBTQQI people as faceless groups, yet not even know that they probably already know one or two individuals and are actually okay with them. It seems usually based in something like public homophobia, regardless of the sexualities involved. Fear based on ignorance and insecurity. Your friend is a good one, and it sounds like most of the folks on the forum are, too.

I hope you realize what an inspiration your strength is to me and probably quite a few others that are following in your footsteps. Hope your week is good.

-Sara

maynardja said...

Im very proud of how far you have come thus far!! I really love you a 1000x more now as who you were ment to be as my dad rather than who you were trying to be! Im glad we can have a great relationship now!! Ill kick your butt if you start selling guitars for shoes LOL. Even tho I do enjoy shoe shopping with you... well when you try them on :P Love you!!!